Whether rightly or wrongly, I have recently stopped taking my anti-depressants. I have attempted to go off them in the past, and have usually found that I quickly realised the error of my ways. This time, I hope it is for good.
I didn't mean to go off the drugs, but I kept forgetting to take them, and when I did, it was every other day or so. So I figured that it was only a small step to eradicating them altogether - so why not! Up until a few days ago, things had been going well. I congratulated myself on breaking 7 years of artificially enhanced seratonin levels. But now I am in a dilemma.
A few things of late have pissed me off. A few other things have made me cry. I have noticed that my tolerance of things is reduced, and I am seem more prone to an emotional reaction. So what I have to ask myself now is - is this normal? Am I so used to having my moods somewhat levelled out (yes people, the dramas of the past few years related here have all been under the assistance of drugs - and are therefore more moderate than they could have been - scary isn't it?) that I don't know how to function with normal roller-coasting emotions? Should I still be on the drugs because roller-coaster emotions AREN'T normal?
I am going to try and ride this out and see if I can function. To illustrate how crazy I feel at the moment, I actually smacked Isabella the other night for some annoying and pretentious behaviour. Me. Smacking my angel. Unbelievable.
So - consider yourselves warned. This could be a bumpy ride.