Monday, June 21, 2004

Big Feet... Large Shoes.

A girlfriend of mine has a theory on penises. A million theories do exist in regards to size (ie related to shoe size, or finger length) and breadth, but the theory I want to share here is on the aesthetic qualities of said member. Admittedly, it is not often that penises can be said to be attractive. Michelangelo tried his hardest with David, but even that was a bit of a disappointment.

The theory of my girlfriend, J2, was shared one evening over many a glass of vino. She announced that her husband's penis, looked just like him. It perhaps wouldn't have been so bad for him, if he hadn't been standing right there when she made this declaration. But then, the room went quiet and we all looked at P - and everyone one in the room was simultaneously creating their own image of his penis. But it is a theory that I have employed ever since that moment - and now everytime I meet a fellow I instantly have an image of their member.

Sometimes the theory comes up accurate - nice looking boy, bit fleshy round the head...... Other times, not quite so on the money - solid commanding gentlemen.....not so much. I recently dated a gentleman, D, who I must say was quite pleasant on the eye (well in my humble opinion anyways). But his penis! While not possessing a member that would be humbling in locker room talk, it certainly the most perfectly formed and pretty penis that I have had the pleasure thus far to encounter. Shame he was such a prick really - on that I have yet to come up with a theory worth trusting!

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