Tonight I wanna cry
Some days I just have the need to cry. Today is one of them. Who knows exactly why; could be a multitude of reasons not excluding PMT, and my own special brand of chemical imbalance. I just do, and I have.
When I am like this there are few things I tend to surround myself with to ensure the full downward spiral experience. Most importantly, one has be slothfully attired, with requisite smudged mascara. Cue: Cath in PJ's. Secondly, there is of course the tendency to mix a drink or ten. Unfortunately, I never seem to stock mixers in the house, so after one curiously blended drink of varieties of straight alcohol, I generally stop.
But one definite for moments such as these, is the entertainment chosen. For such times, I don't want happy and up-beat things to snap me out of it. I want to fully participate in the degeneration of my mood. Sad, sorrowful and mournful songs are always a good start. But I reckon the best standby for me are two particular episodes of Buffy*. These particular episodes stand out for me as being the saddest bits of television ever-produced. The episodes in question are "Wild at Heart" and "The Body". They deal with death, love, loss and longing, and all done with the deft touch of Joss Whedon, which never fails to push me to tears. There is no sentimentality, just raw gritty emotion.
Another goodie for me is the movie "Truly Madly Deeply", which opens with Juliet Stevenson crying rivers of tears. Always a good start for a tear-jerker.
Maybe getting emotions out of my system using such devices is a little Pavlovian. But somehow, it is cleansing. Somehow the lacrimal glands wash away my pain for another day.
*Have I mentioned that Buffy is the most perfect television show ever made? Just so you know.