Saturday, October 27, 2007

Perhaps I made a bad decision...

The general malaise that has been plaguing me of late, and was duly noted by my therapist on Monday, has sunk me further, I regret to say. This morning I hit rock-bottom, and unfortunately had to put on a brave face and attend another speed dating event that I had already booked (and paid) for. I shall not be surprised if I get no matches from that event, and furthermore, I don't know if I care that much.

The slow leeching of the anit-depressants from my body seems to have at last finished. Thus the fact that I feel so low, and extraordinarily apathetic. I have contemplated this blog on hold until I feel better - but we shall see about that. It seems that I do need, if not drugs, some sort of chemical enhancement for my mood. I am going to try some natural things for a while, I just worry that they will take a while to kick in. Things are so flat in my head at the moment that every second feels like an eternity that I have to work through.

But to add even more poignancy to today's low vibe, I realised that I was shoe-shopping - but for COMFORTABLE SHOES. This is clearly the first sign of the coming apocalypse.


Natalia said...

I was just doing research about physical symptoms. I am not depressed but I am under a lot of emotional stress. The malaise...the aches. It sucks. I have no advise though. Just commiseration.

Perseus said...

My mum always said lesbians wore 'comfortable shoes'.

I read in National geographic about something called 'the golden mean', which is some mathematical premise of 'perfect balance'. That's what you need in a shoe. A golden mean of comfort and fashion. In this way, the apocalypse may be averted.

(Sorry, I have no relationship advice because I suck at them as much as you do. Shoes, on the other hand, is more down my alley.)

londongirl said...

I can't advise on shoes really as I have fat feet and really struggle to buy any I can wear. Grr.

But on the subject of feeling low, please try exercise - dancing to great music round your living room, a walk on a sunny day, or a gym class. You'll hate the idea of it, but you should hopefully feel better afterwards.

Best of luck. I feel for you.

kiki said...

i could probably hook you up with some alternative anti-depressants... if you want.