Wednesday, January 28, 2009

"I can't stand up for falling down"

I have never pretended that I am glamorous or elegant. I think my potty mouth usually dispels any mystery there. I am capable of being quite adept on my feet when there is music playing (evidence my attempts at tap and other dancing), but I really don't possess great hand/eye coordination. I nearly always wear shoes with some sort of significant heel, which takes some level of skill to master. Many years of practice has meant that I am enviable in heels, and Subtle admittedly likes the swagger that a heel adds to one's walk.

But generally I consider myself a little clutzy. Although I have no great history of self-inflicted wounds, as in broken bones and the like, my clutziness was proven two weeks ago when I managed to fall down some stairs and sprain my ankle*. In bare feet. With no alcohol. I have been trying to find ways to dramatize the story - at the very least to make it sound less pathetic. I have been asked was I drinking heavily? No. I was also asked what sort of activity was I undertaking - wild and exotic dancing? None - just walking. I also have tried telling people that it wasn't my fault - Subtle pushed me down the stairs, but really it is more believable that I am just clumsy (and he wasn't home at the time anyway - but no matter).

The irony of the situation is that as I was walking down the stairs, I was cuddling Isabella, reassuring her that everything was ok**. The words "Mummy wouldn't let anything ever happen to you" were barely out of my mouth when I collapsed in a screaming bundle, almost squashing Isabella into the bargain. She ran for safe cover from my weeping and moaning, while I had to hop to the phone to tell Subtle I had hurt myself.

Clearly I need to not only work on my personal balance, but also train the cat to autodial for assistance. I am now hobbling, and out of tap action for a few weeks. I hope that regular programming will resume shortly! To add insult to injury, I am reduced to wearing flat open shoes to work. Oh for shame....

* My sprain is apparently "quite bad" with a full tear of a ligment, some sexy bruising from my toes to my calf and some quite stunning swelling.

**We were staying in another house with a large, sort of dumb (but well-meaning), dog at the time.


jo_blue said...

I always thought that when I grew up, the falling down would stop. Not to be, as my left knee, elbow and left groin ligament will attest. You have my sympathies m'dear, it does sound quite bad. Still, it does give you a good reason to sit still and blog, no?

kiki said...

i've stuffed both ankles on seperate occasions. the first time i did nothing in terms of rehab, the second (becuase ankles NEVER heal properly) i invested in one of those balance boards

you should seriously get one and use it as often as you can after a couple of weeks of rest.

helps your ankle rebuild and improves your balance

win win